Nip it in the Bud

I’ll just take a moment to say what I mean before I mean what I say. I want to make clear that this poem is not blaming anyone, including myself, for mental ill health or abuse. Hell happens. This is a message for people before the brink, who might be able to nip things in the bud. It could be a mental health issue, an addiction, an eating disorder, a behaviour. Usually if you’ve got one, you’ve got the lot – it’s a bit like GCSEs. So my message is: don’t end up like me, be like her. Who’s her? She’s a woman in the audience who was a bit irritated when I read that last poem. Because she was very tempted to go off the deep end in her 20s. But she didn’t, because she managed to nip things in the bud. So now she doesn’t have the certificates of madness or gold medals in gymnastics at the mental health Olympics. And there are extreme experiences she can’t write about because she didn’t do them. What does that woman have? She has years more stability. Hopefully she’s had a stablish home, healthier relationships. And she’s got loads more writing under her belt – she’s practised technique and written about much more interesting subjects (at first, when you get a diagnosis or you learn how you were traumatised, it blows your mind but explosions get really boring after a while). And this woman’s going to get up and read a poem that’s better than mine. Maybe it’s even been published. Maybe she has a collection. Good for her. So: please be like her, not like me. Our depth of feeling is the same. Pain is an unlimited reservoir, it’s not reserved for people with certificates. By all means, do get professional help but it’s not all about professionals. It can’t be, not least because of waiting lists – there are waiting lists for crises these days. So let’s support each other to do whatever it takes. Because if you keep leaving pieces of your brain and your soul and your vagina around Manchester, eventually there’ll be parts you can’t get back. Better to be intact. OK, let’s nip this in the bud.

This bright voice

has been here since the beginning

amid the watery Word and its blood.

The centre of life

has always been sacrifice.

What we let happen will leave us undone.

And I’ve been with you and through you

And in you and to you

since you were a child, just a shrug.

I’ve whispered, I’ve gleamed,

sent signs, sonnet-screams

full of unrequited love.

So I saw your Mum’s scowls, whiplashes

of whisky that snapped elastically

back to her cups.

And you, floored, crosslegged,

dimlit and deadheaded,

learning that quiet means good.

Then your Fagin father greeting your long-drift

with a paper-thin gift:

a twenty note flicked like a crumb.

You took it like a tissue,

as a hollow box kiss, you

resolved never to nip kids in the bud.

Of course you will, as I do,

as sure as bruises back blue

but pruning can grow roses’ ruds –

healths of reds driving green

(the best gardening’s unseen).

What if your flowers stood up?

Mistake-me-not, evil’s real.

It reels in devils’ detailed deals.

Nota bene: negotiation must

start and end with a “no”.

So when he alleys you – no.

And when he hotels you – no.

And when he unwraps you – no.

And when he unseals you – no.

And when he tethers you – no.

And when he severs you – no.

And when I’m too late –

Yes. I felt how it hurt in your

softest place that night - cut-kite -

he nipped your body in the bud.

So you’re spiralling,

high-wiring,

releasing reality

and Piccadilly Gardens-ing.

Did you know it’s Freudian:

“repetition compulsion”?

No one can blame

your fallings like rain

but, water – where does it end?

When you wake up in a puddle

in a hovel

behind a locked door?

When you evaporate for days,

come leaking home,

your memory condensed? Or

all these tricklings

until, what, the weight of water

depths your dawning?

Darling, I’m afraid, no matter how heavy,

you have no rock bottom –

I’ve slugged through levels of hells of muds.

I’ve sunk past slimes of seabeds

to the cold side of the moon.

Believe me, there’s nothing good.

Now I’m crying

while I’m writing this.

My tears washing years like the flood

of waste, a sewer,

I felt run like blood through her.

How I wish she’d nipped those bad buds.

Imagine the poems!

Lost in landfill. In shit.

The only art is the art that becomes.

Next time you’re circling like a drain,

pour yourself down a page –

its architect’s magic, the pipework leads up.

Listen, you’re just as cared for and complex

minus diagnosis’ capital kisses,

pre-pills, ante-attempts, beforewards.

Attempt a poem! Make pen friends.

The first healers are artists

who are priests who, unsheathed, are God’s bards.

Go set watch to a stage!

Like a window, it’s mirror-image:

we’re both here for each other’s looks.

Take it from me, do re mi,

the glass ones will never see

and the paned-people already would.

Poets are seers. We see

permutations of places

you don’t need to go – cos I know you could

have rhymed it redder,

end-said it deader, but you conjugate

blood better when you kill buds.

When you’re ready, I’ll bring you rooms

the size of brooms. I’ll spell silences –

canvases. You’ll tell some.

Life-wise we’ll sit,

yes, opposite,

minds meeting on the same side of

archaeologied hate.

Truth-tooled, I’ll help excavate

back to your mantle, past books of rust.

Under-dark, I promise

you’re already a person with pages of face

and an alethiometer gut.

You’ll come to calibrate breakdown,

prophesy end days nounbound.

At crossroads’ crux, you’ll North love.

The strength that’d take!

Please, for her’s sake,

reverse your Hollywood hearse, buckle up.

Till one day you’ll tall into a hall,

mic-maestro over your hill of ill,

your wall of well. To perform good.

I’ll be so proud of you.

Round pride up to two!

She’s as proud as punches of motherhood.

And when you ever worry your war’s

small or invisible, you’ll see me

in the street, in a brew, in a book.

Your pupils, spades of pain, will tunnel

me through it. Eye’ll say “you can do it”.

You can keep nipping this in the bud.

Well, this haunting from an

undead poet is all I can leave you.

Daughter, I hope it’s enough.

Plainly: I see you. I choose you.

I cheer you. I root you

to nip what you must in the bud.

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We Who Wrestle With Sylvia